| Advice
on the Job . . .
PROBLEM
PEOPLE AT WORK - Trolls and Gremlins
Employees sometimes
encounter difficult people at work. Encountering just one of these individuals
can end a promising long-term career with a company and can transform
an otherwise desirable job into a nightmare.
The
following are some personal observations culled from decades of client
tales about bad bosses and about techniques that have been useful to clients
dealing with these difficult individuals at work. They are sometimes humorous,
but then humor can also be a survival strategy. Specific fictional case
examples are provided as well.
For
analytical purposes, we have divided the world of difficult people at
work into trolls (bosses) and gremlins (peers and subordinates). Unfortunately,
the catalogue is more illustrative than comprehensive.
Troll
Classification GUIDE
We
have all had a troll encounter at sometime in our lives. The following
is a guide to recognize and handling some of the worst of these disagreeable
authority figures in our lives.
The Basic Troll
The
Basic Troll is your basic over-aggressive boss. He yells all the time
and explodes under pressure. He is also very competent except for his
inter-personal skills.
The
Basic Troll either owns the business or is indispensable in some way,
because if he wasn’t, his lack of interpersonal skills is such that no
one would put up with him. Sometimes reasonable individuals evolve into
basic trolls when they are given a great deal of power. Judges are often
basic trolls, for example.
You
are dealing with a basic troll if your boss:
-
Has
a bad temper;
-
Worries
a lot about results;
-
Has
a reputation of being very competent but difficult/impossible to work
for;
-
Does
not care what other people think;
-
Is
at the top of the corporation, an owner of the business or otherwise
indispensable to the business.
How
to Handle the Basic Troll
The
biggest problem with handling the Basic Troll is your own fear. The
troll is ugly and frightening and he makes such a loud noise, the stress
alone can kill you. You must be able to control your fear. If you get
anxious under pressure and tend to freeze up or screw up, forget it,
because you are now in big trouble.
First,
steel yourself against yelling. Also do not take the insults personally.
Think about meeting your boss’s needs, not about getting approval. Not
that this is very easy, but it works if you can do it and calms down
a Basic Troll right away.
Please
note: If you have any tendency to lie, fudge results, or deflect blame
when you make a mistake, the Basic Troll will ferret you out and eat
you alive. If you do make a mistake in front of a Basic Troll, it is
imperative that you confess and take full responsibility. If you do,
the Basic Troll may be surprisingly understanding and help you solve
the problem.
If
you do not understand what the Basic Troll wants, it is imperative that
you ask for immediate clarification. If you do not understand, try to
guess and go off in the wrong direction, it could be disastrous. In
order to successfully work with the Baisc Troll, you need to be able
to stand your ground. Remember the Basic Troll’s focus is not on how
he looks or how he is obeyed--his focus is on results. To get good results,
you may need to argue with him or to convince him to change direction.
If
you are performance oriented, competent and confident, you may work
well with the Basic Troll and be rewarded over time. The Basic Troll,
while certainly scary and unpleasant, is not really evil, and he can
turn out to be very loyal.
The
Secret Troll
Secret
Trolls hide. They even hide the fact that they hide things. Above all,
they do not want their true identity disclosed. To this end, they will
exert enormous self-control to disguise their true emotions and to avoid
any kind of conflict that might expose the deception.
A
Secret Troll will appear at first blush like a friendly helpful person.
In some ways, a Secret Troll is the opposite of a Basic Troll. A Secret
Troll is pleasant to deal with and never scary. At least until it’s too
late and the damage is already done.
First
and foremost, a Secret Troll wants to appear like a Nice Person. Although
the Secret Troll is always truly self-interested and lives under the Bridge
in a Dark Place with other trolls, this is not apparent. Secret Troll
bosses usually have excellent interpersonal skills, and they appear to
be your friend and to be very understanding. They also never get angry.
Everything
this troll does is calculated. Their primary motivation at all times is
how they look to their superiors and whether or not any action they take
is likely to advance their career. Fundamentally, Secret Trolls
have no ethics and are completely ruthless. They are also often extraordinarily
successful.
Early
identification clues that you have a Secret Troll Boss include:
-
There
is unusual turnover in staff;
-
Employees who work for them seem inordinately anxious and attentive;
-
He
or she appears modest and low-key and your initial impression is
positive;
-
They
are already very powerful or they are in the process of quickly
becoming powerful.
If
you become an impediment to their advancement, the Secret Troll will
mow you down. To survive, you must keep a low profile and be careful
to focus your efforts entirely on making your boss look good. If the
Secret Troll boss screws up, you will be expected to take the fall.
One advantage of this kind of boss is that he or she is likely to be
promoted within the company and acquire more power. You can advance
on their coattails, provided you are willing to be 100% loyal and devoted.
The
Secret Troll boss has situational ethics and he will expect you to have
the same. If you do not have the moral flexibility required for this,
you will get in trouble. Generally, since the Secret Trolls do not want
to deal with conflict, you will have to do it for them. For example,
you will be the one to fire their subordinates and to deliver bad news.
Moreover, do not expect your boss to protect you. If the action the
Secret Troll boss requires you to take is too controversial for your
boss’s superiors, you will take the fall.
Secret Troll Defense
Get
away unless you want to morph into a Secret Troll. Long term, only upper
management and other Secret Trolls can get along with Secret Troll bosses.
Love
Trolls
The
Love Troll is on a permanent power high. The Love Troll usually works
for a company where managers have special protection because they perform
an essential irreplaceable service, they are the owner, are related to
the owner or something similar).
The
Love Troll regularly makes sexual overtures towards employees of the sexual
persuasion to which they are attracted. The Love Troll promotes their
attractive and flirtatious friends and give them special attention while
ignoring others. They are often married.
To
the extent that the Love Troll's sexual harassment behavior is part of
a general willingness to abuse power, he or she may have other ethical
issues as well.
Love
Troll Defense
Sometimes,
the Love Troll backs away if you have clear boundaries and don’t make
them too angry. But Love Trolls can be very dangerous. If you need to
complain to human resources (and you probably do to preserve your legal
remedies), watch out for retaliation. You have to consider how much
power the Love Troll has. If the Love Troll owns the company, you are
obviously not going to get anywhere. You definitely need to hire
the best employment lawyer you can. Even if you don’t want to bring
a legal action, you are well advised to at least counsel with an employment
lawyer behind the scenes.
Good
Ol’ Troll
The
Good Ol’ Troll can be a serious problem for employees who are not good
ol’ sorts themselves. This is not necessarily gender based because there
are Good Ol’ Girls as well as Good Ol’ Boys. If you are not comfortable
working with groups and are not connected to people based on relationships,
you will have trouble. This boss will not evaluate you solely based on
the merits of your work.
If,
on the other hand, you are the preferred type, gender and attitude, you
will be rewarded with a truly loyal and sympathetic boss. One of the unusual
features of these bosses is loyalty is so important that if you get in
trouble, they will support you no matter how damaging to their own careers.
These
bosses are trouble for the following types:
-
Employees who aren’t team oriented;
-
Individuals with markedly different backgrounds, cultures or interests
(i.e., sports boss wants sports employees; intellectual boss wants
intellectual employees);
-
Whistle-blowers (the Good Ol’ Troll fires whistle-blowers);
-
Non-relational people;
-
Employees
who are much older than the boss;
-
Employees of a different gender if the boss is primarily comfortable
with only one gender.
The
Good Ol’ Troll tends to be a competent people-oriented manager, but he
may overlook stuff, cut people too much slack, and ignore procedural,
legal and more abstract ethical considerations that do not affect relationships
on the job.
The
Good Ol’ Trolls are generally decent ethical individuals, but they do
not relate to abstract notions of fairness. Fairness to them is personal
and within the Good Ol’ family.
Good
Ol’ Troll Handling
The
way to handle these bosses is to try to relate to them. If you have
a problem, talk to them about it; find an area of interest in common;
confide in them, ask for help. Minimize your differences in interests
and background. Never turn down a social invitation from this boss.
He will remember.
These
bosses are really tricky if you are a different gender or ethnicity.
They may just plain discriminate and you may need to seek an experienced
employment attorney for legal assistance.
Dopey
Troll
The
Dopey Troll is, well, a dope. He may not be deficient in IQ points, but
he is certainly deficient in sense and confidence. His orientation is
based on hiding this. He is susceptible to predatory sociopathic employees
who manipulate him by helping appear competent. These employees prey on
the Dopey Troll by building his self-esteem, but their real motive is
to gain power and wield it over others. Some of the most corrupt and difficult
office environments are created by Dopey Trolls.
Unless
you are a predatory employee (or in cahoots with one), these bosses spell
disaster.
Dopey
Troll Identification
You
recognize the Dopey troll by the following:
-
They
have trouble making decisions;
-
They
are nice guys;
-
They
are blind to manipulative flattering employees to whom they over-delegate
and who seize power for their own ends;
-
Their
departments are poorly run and do not perform.
The
problems you will encounter working for this kind of boss include:
-
The
Dopey Troll is not fair;
-
You
will not be rewarded for good performance;
-
You
will not receive necessary assistance to do a good job;
-
Manipulative employees will run the department and reward their
friends and punish others.
Handling
Techniques for Dopey Trolls
Leave
unless you are a dope yourself or a predator.
Messy
Troll
The
Messy Troll is very disorganized but may be a creative genius. Messy Trolls
are often successful entrepreneurs and founders of companies.
The
Messy Troll needs
help from his employees to be more organized and effective. Employees
who are very concrete and literal cannot work for this type of boss. The
Messy Troll needs employees who do not listen to his specific words but
who can understand his intent and deal with him appropriately. He also
needs employees who are able to take the initiative in structuring him
and who can check in with him at appropriate intervals and ask questions
so that they can translate appropriately.
Employees
who are too timid or who require someone to tell him or her exactly what
to do will clearly have trouble. Employees who do not check in or ask
questions will not understand what he wants.
Messy
Troll Handling Technique
-
Check
in frequently and ask questions;
-
Remember
it is easy to completely misunderstand what this boss wants;
-
Be
comfortable working on projects without specific instructions;
-
Take
it upon yourself to check for deadlines;
-
Be
willing to structure your assignments yourself, constantly checking
with your boss to confirm that your structure format is correct;
-
Take
cues well from non-verbal communication;
-
Be
sensitive to the business needs behind the assignment;
-
Be
prepared to figure out business needs on your own and make your
own assignments to yourself, again checking in with your boss.
Vain Troll
The
Vain or Narcissist Trolls must maintain the reality at all times that
they are both competent and virtuous. These Trolls usually have issues
in one or both of these areas because they are unwilling to see flaws
in themselves. Since they cannot see the flaws, they cannot compensate
for them.
The
Vain Troll bends reality to perceive it in accordance with his narcissist
needs. He thus never recognizes that he has made a mistake--someone else
is always at fault, such as you, his employee. You can never criticize
a Vain Troll to his face: this is career suicide. It is consequently impossible
to give this kind of boss honest feedback.
Unlike
the Secret Troll, the Vain Troll is not particularly insightful about
the political environment in which he operates. Because of their vanity,
Vain Trolls are easy to deceive and manipulate. The Vain Troll is distinguished
from the Dopey Troll because the Vain Troll is usually a true leader,
a hard worker and often genuinely talented and charismatic as well.
The
Vain Troll tolerates incompetent subordinates if they make the Vain Troll
feel competent.
Vain
Troll Identification
Ways
to identify the Vain Troll are the following:
-
They
cannot acknowledge mistakes or flaws;
-
Their
primary anxiety is about looking good to themselves; not to their
superiors like the Secret Troll;
-
You
can undermine them behind their back and they may not recognize
it if you flatter them to their face;
-
If
threatened they will always change their perception of their reality
before they are willing to change their position.
Vain
Troll Handling Techniques
To
get along with this kind of boss, it helps to:
Creepy Troll
The
Creepy Troll boss has serious psychopathology. He lacks boundaries, sexual
and otherwise. He may be extremely seductive to employees. He can behave
like your best friend/confessor/parent giving freely of his time and of
material things as well.
The
Creepy Troll latches on to any employee in trouble. If an employee is
lonely and going through a divorce, this boss is anxious to help and provide
a shoulder or more (if you are of the opposite sex) to cry on. The Creepy
Troll wants to be primary in your life, before any other relationship.
This
kind of boss is dangerous--both to your career and to your own mental
health. He wants to break down all barriers between you and eventually
break you down into his mindless puppet. And he will be remarkably successful,
if you let him. There is absolutely no way to work for this kind of boss
and stay healthy. Moreover, the Creepy Troll will go to great lengths
to hurt you if you ever attempt to assert your independence or turn away
in any healthy way. Get out!
The
Creepy Troll is generally very unethical at the core. Moreover they secretly
think of themselves as Masters of the Universe.
Creepy
Troll Identification
You
can recognize this troll by the following:
-
Unlike
the Classic Troll or the Dopey Troll, he does not respect boundaries.
He gets excessively involved with his employees. He may have sexual
relationships or become too intimate in other ways.
-
The
Creepy Troll lacks moral as well as emotional boundaries. This boss
is corrupt and dangerous.
-
He
often owns or runs his own business or non-profit organization.
He generally has a bad upbringing and terrific ambition.
-
He
tends to be “too helpful” or “too nice” in a way that you don’t
understand at first.
-
He
often cheats or commits illegal acts in their business dealings--he
crosses boundaries there as well.
-
He
makes you uncomfortable at first. Then he seduces you, and you think
he's a great guy. Down the road further you just feel dirty around
him.
-
His
long-term employees tend to be dependent, with abuse histories from
prior relationships.
-
He
tends to have bad family relationships.
-
After
a while, he feels, well, creepy.
Creepy Troll Handling
Don’t. Run for your
life.
The
Abacus Troll
The
Abacus Troll is more comfortable with numbers than with people. Abacus
Trolls are hard-working and usually promoted in spite of their lack of
people skills because they are great at faithfully following rules and
focusing on budgets and short-term concrete goals. Abacus Trolls seem
to come to the forefront in companies whenever companies are in financial
panics or being transitioned to “lean and mean” with emphasis on mean.
These
guys are the hatchet people. They are comfortable laying off long-term
employees, reducing benefits, and imposing impossible goals on others.
They speak and think in corporate double speak and are no doubt the inspiration
for the devil boss in the comic strip, Dilbert. The Abacus Trolls see
their job functions purely in process terms--i.e., they are successful
if they meet abstract numbers; the fact that the core business is falling
apart for long term purposes may not even register on their screen.
Working
for the Abacus Troll is difficult for employees who are more people-oriented
or big picture oriented. And if you do not like playing numbers games
and REALLY care about what you do, this Troll is definitely your enemy.
Ways
to recognize the Abacus Troll include the following:
-
You
don’t like them (unless you are also a numbers person);
-
You
don’t respect them (unless you are also a numbers person);
-
They
frequently have accounting or other technical backgrounds;
-
They
are very ambitious and lack much personality;
-
They
are workaholics.
Abacus
Troll Defense
Abacus
Trolls are toxic for most of us. However, you may do fine if you are
similarly inclined. If not, you can also do fine if you have great people
skills and are willing to apply them to assist your boss. Also, sometimes
these bosses don’t last very long, and you may be able to wait them
out until they’re gone.
Gremlin
Classification Guide
Gremlins
are peers and subordinates who are difficult problem people. Unlike trolls,
gremlins hide their true identity to maximize their power. This tends
to make them extra dangerous. Although occasionally a gremlin will creep
into the best-run office, unhealthy offices to provide the best enrichment
for gremlins to flourish.
If
you are for any reason facing a gremlin or two at work, this will help
you analyze the situation and consider some options. Some common types
of gremlins include the Green Gremlin, the Jilted Gremlin, and the Wronged
Gremlin.
Green
Gremlin
One
of the biggest dangers for employees comes from the Green Gremlin. These
are unethical and ruthlessly ambitious employees who feign kindness, helpfulness
and loyalty.
The
best defense here is an early warning system. Recognizing this individual
while you are still in a position to protect yourself is key. When they
grow up and becomes a boss the Green Gremlin turns into a Troll--most
likely a Secret Troll and sometimes a Vain Troll or a Creepy Troll. The
following are signs to pay attention to:
-
The
employee seems almost too nice to be true;
-
Other
employees seem wary of this person without apparent reason;
-
The
employee denies being ambitious;
-
Employees supervised by this individual dislike him, while higher-level
supervisors like him a great deal;
-
The
employee portrays himself as a team player, but in reality always
acts out of his perceived self-interest. For example, if he files
a grievance or complaint or protests wrongful conduct of others, it
is only because he is already in trouble and is seeking to bring down
a supervisor before the supervisor brings him down.
Employees
who are ruthless can ruin careers of others, particularly other employees
who befriend them or trust them. They can secretly criticize you to others
or fail to support you during crucial moments. The fact that you treat
them as friends or with respect when they undermine you to others often
gives them extra clout--i.e. it appears as though they are people worth
listening to based on your attitude. They are often masterful at scapegoating
you while appearing to support you.
Green
Gremlin Defense
First
and foremost, recognize the danger. This is the most important thing
you can do to protect yourself. Then watch your back. Anticipate the
Gremlin’s moves in advance and protect yourself.
Watch
out that you do not get so carried away with the demands of your work
that you neglect the emotional needs of your peers. Build alliances.
You need inside political support AND information about what the Gremlin
is doing, and that requires support from others. Sometimes, a little
sensitivity will even forestall the development of the Green Gremlin
in the first place.
In
this regard, some suggestions are:
-
Sensitize yourself to be aware of your impact on others. Listen
carefully for early signs of resentment by others;
-
Do
not assume that other employees think and feel the way you do;
-
No
matter how busy you are, stay in touch and check in with the employees
with whom you work. They matter! If someone is distancing himself
or herself, pay attention and try to be particularly kind and thoughtful;
-
Make
a conscious effort not to be critical of others and try to make
them feel better about themselves;
-
If
you are reasonably sensitive and thoughtful, and you are aware that
there is still a Green Gremlin trying to hurt you, try to get help
from other employees and management, if necessary. Relationships
count a lot here. If you don’t have support, you should consider
transferring to a different department or getting another job.
The Jilted Gremlin
The
Jilted Gremlin feels hurt and rejected. Sometimes, these are simply overly
sensitive pathological types. More often, it is someone who was your friend/date/lover
who still cares about you, but in a negative way. The following are suggestions
for dealing with Jilted Gremlins:
-
Be
careful whom you get involved with in the first place. Keeping personal
boundaries between yourself and other employees is a good idea, particularly
if you are planning a permanent career with your present employer.
-
Be
sensitive about behavior that can be perceived as rejection by others.
If you break-up or decide to cool it with a friendship, explain the
reasons in a tactful manner and reassure the other person in the relationship
about your loyalty and positive perception of them.
In
general the best precaution for not having problems with this type of
employee is not to get too involved with these individuals in the first
place. It is best to avoid sexual relationships or other intense special
intimate relationships with your peers at work. If you do think about
getting involved in such a relationship, understand your vulnerability
and think seriously about the emotional maturity of the individual with
whom you are considering becoming involved. Getting involved with the
wrong person can spell disaster at work-- particularly when the relationship
breaks up.
Ways
to recognize employees who are a special risk to become overly involved
with include:
-
Employees who are overly seductive at the beginning of the relationship
and excessively eager to please;
-
Employees who show early signs of unusual possessiveness -- i.e. remember
Glynn Close’s character in the movie, Fatal Attraction;
-
Employees who are generally isolated and who carry a lot of internal
anger.
Often
this Gremlin presents as the perfect employee who is absolutely loyal
to their boss. They live and breathe to protect their boss. They lack
boundaries and have merged with their boss as much as possible. Vain Trolls
are often attracted to this kind of Gremlin.
The
Wronged Gremlin
These
employees are characteristically negative people and they can single-handedly
sour the work environment. Wronged gremlins are often in subordinate positions.
These employees create problems for others because they transfer their
problems and issues to other employees rather than dealing with them directly.
These employees are often passive-aggressive and/or narcissistic. They
work subtly by imparting misinformation, information out of context or
one-sided information. These gremlins almost always lack insight into
their own behaviors and they rationalize their behavior by their view
of themselves as victims of other powerful and evil employees.
Signs
to Recognize Wronged Gremlins:
-
They
portray themselves in a noble self-sacrificing and suffering light;
-
They
often adopt other vulnerable employees and become their protector;
-
They
tend to be highly critical of other employees behind their backs
where those employees are perceived as any kind of threat;
-
They
are complainers;
-
They
may be idealists;
-
They
see the world as black and white or good and evil;
-
They
may be talented, yet have set up their lives so they are not as
successful as their abilities warrant;
-
There
is generally someone at work--usually a supervisor--who is the target
of their anger;
-
They
have a victim mentality about life -- they do not accept responsibility
for things that happen to them;
Employees
like this can often turn on you. They can be wonderful at first and
turn on you when you obtain a position of power or if a situation develops
where they blame you for some condition at work. Often, because of their
low self-esteem, these employees are ultra-sensitive to criticism. The
best advice is to be careful and keep your distance. Avoid these employees
if possible.
If
you have such an employee in your midst, distance yourself and watch
your back. That employee is not to be trusted. Unfortunately, direct
confrontation rarely helps at all because of the rigid views of these
employees. If you do not have the power to terminate the employee, the
best defense here is to identify and isolate the employee. You need
to share your insights with other employees and work together. If the
problem is serious enough, you may need to involve the employer as well
by informing him or her what is happening.
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